The fog is clearing . . . I can actually see parts of my house I haven’t seen in months. Today, for the first time in ages, I actually was able to clear off my work table and clean it. I of course immediately started to pile things on it again, but with a purpose. Here are some of the things that get forgotten when you are the mother-of-the-bride, and your photographers, although wonderful, are not wedding photographers. We forgot to take some key pictures that go into the wedding book. Things like the table settings and centerpieces. I was totally upset about that one. The groom’s aunt made all the centerpieces, and it was one of the important things to photograph. Totally slipped off the radar for me, and let’s be honest. Our photographer, brought in last minute with much love, was not a wedding photographer, and a guy. So who would expect him to think of it. But worse, I even did it to myself. All the hours I spent working on the ‘theme’ décor. The only pictures I have are from a distance, and I took them after we set up, I was the one that forgot my own stuff! Geez, you just get so wrapped up in the emotion of the day you just lose all of that. But, at least I can recreate some of it. So that is my project now. I am working on still-life shots with things from the wedding day.
As far as other things I have learned, don’t expect your daughter to react the way you would think. I knew my oldest was easy going, and we shouldn’t have too many issues. The problem was she is too easy going. To the point she didn’t like to make decisions and things just kept getting put off. I really feel that a wedding planner is a wonderful thing. Not that you have to hire one, but you have to appoint one. Someone has to be in charge, and Mom nagging just doesn’t work. Finding a friend who isn’t involved in the wedding, someone who knows the family, but not necessarily friends with the bride or groom. Now we tried to set something up, but unfortunately it fell through because of health issues. But we didn’t pursue a replacement, and that was our mistake. Then my girls and I have always done thing together, but the youngest had joined Color Guard at school, the wild child started a new job and had to leave for a week training just two weeks before the wedding, and even the bride was offered a contract job the three weeks before the wedding. I lost my whole team! We then lost our videographer, photographer, and two of our three kitchen staff. BUT our Village won out, and people were there to come to the rescue.
The whole theme of the wedding reception was “Family History”. My love of genealogy was a driving force, but it gave us something to use as decoration that was keepable. We didn’t spend money on decorations to throw away. The idea was that family begins with a marriage; when two people join together bringing each side to make one family, one branch. I did a lot of work on the family trees before the wedding, that part was so enjoyable for me. It helped to balance out the stressors. So for me it was a terrific idea, and gave something special to many others as well. But, I was also able to add my Village as part of that family history. They were all there, in our trees. Because it does not have to be by blood, not even by marriage. Family is all by LOVE, and I am blessed with a very big one.